Caught in the sandwich generation
and just spread too thin?
Here's what it means...
a generation of people, typically in their thirties or forties and sometimes fifties (like me), responsible for bringing up their own children and for the care of their aging parents.
I’m Tina. I’m a busy mom of two teenagers, I run my own Interior Design / Staging business while caring for my elderly mom who has suffered some major health issues this past year. I’m sure you know that it’s not easy to step into being a caretaker for your parents and balance everyday life with your own family.
I want you to know that you’re not alone in this
I want you to know that it’s okay to feel frustrated and overwhelmed.
I want you to know that NO ONE is perfect so stop trying to be and allow yourself some grace.
Let go and let God carry you through your darkest moments. Let us journey together and find peace as we try to navigate these challenges we face.
we can find a balance
I'm not an expert, but I've learned a lot along the way
When we bought my mom’s house about 4 years ago and moved her into the guest house, we had no idea just how much she needed us.
Everything Happens for a reason
I live by those words! Truly. I think my friends all silently roll their eyes because I say it ALL THE TIME! But it really does help! When you say it out loud, you release it to the universe, or like me, you surrender it to God, you can accept what is happening to you with grace and peace. Isn’t that so liberating?
I'm a Club Sandwich!
I know, it sounds ridiculous, right? Well, if you think being caught in the Sandwich Generation is hard enough, try adding a child with learning challenges to the mix and taking care of my mom along with an older husband who also battles heart disease.
for I am your God, the Eternal One, and I will remain with you wherever you go.
If you care for others, you have to take care of yourself first. I'll never forget what my therapist said to me, 'if you're on a plane in an emergency situation, you have to put your oxygen mask on first before you can help your child, or others'. How can we be any good to others when we are not good to ourselves? Get rid of the guilt. We need to recharge and refresh, just like your computer. Otherwise, we will run out of fuel.
It was overwhelming to educate myself on my mom's medical history and current medical status. She was taking 4-5 medications that I was not in the least bit familiar with. I had to research and document all her medication and side effects of each one and made note of all the expiration dates so I can be sure to get the refills in before she runs out. We are blessed with a mom and pop pharmacy in our neighborhood who take the more personal approach than the chain pharmacies and they remind me when my mom is due for her next refill. Unheard of these days, right? I highly encourage you to support your local mom & pop pharmacy if it's a good fit for you.
We don't have to be Super Woman so don't cast that burden on yourself. We need a village of support to get us through life. We don't have to do it all alone, but often times, we feel that we should or we feel that if we can't manage it ourselves, we are failing. As women, we put too much pressure on ourselves and our pride kicks in when we know we should ask for help. I'm a firm believer in support groups. That got me through the hardest times with my daughter and now I find that it's helpful in knowing how to care for my mom better. My husband and my step-daughter are champs when it comes to helping with my mom. I am grateful everyday.
please share your story
No one is ever alone in their walk of life. Together we can build each other up, make eachother strong and find a place to speak your truth and not be judged. No one is perfect, and the minute we can truly surrender to that belief, we can respond more with grace when faced with challenging moments. You, my friend, are not alone.